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Poem3

learning to be a human from you

was awful

because you had no kindness 

in your eyes

looking at those as a child

i know you used them against me 

you knew you only needed

one mean look

one aggressive head turn in my direction

and i’d crumble beneath it

you always joked

“i never had to spank you dayna, just had to look at you wrong”

i always thought

i was so good

so quirky

so cute

but i was vulnerable & u used it against me

as a child 

as an adult

the last time i saw you

you threw one last mean look at me

trying to manipulate me with your animal stare

i don’t know where u learned to do that

i don’t know why my heart stops & i feel like im being hunted 

i don’t know why i ran

why i sobbed

but also

felt clarity

that was the last time you’d use your violent eyes against me 

that was the last time

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i’d tolerate it